So, with the decision to move to NYC finalized, the next step in the line of execution is formulating a plan. Although I have had many friends opt to move eastwards at the drop of a hat, I don’t see as moving to New York as a decision I can make a mere month or two before the fact. It is very important to me that I am able to move there feeling secure, both financially and mentally. The culture shock will inevitably be jarring, and after living in the same ‘hood for all twenty-eight years of my life, being away from the familiarity of family and friends and my favorite local haunts seems almost inconceivable. Fortunately, I have the benefit of moving with my boyfriend – I will have someone there who is also adjusting, someone who I can come home to that is familiar and loving, where we can discuss the struggles and joys of building a new life in a new city. But, as much as emotional support is important during a process like this, the major factor looming overhead with NYC, as with most things in the world, is MONEY.
It’s no secret that New York is far pricier to live in than most cities. Fortunately, San Francisco has been neck-in-neck with the Big Apple for a while now, vying for the title of “Most Expensive City In America,” so I have SOME local reference point to look towards. But, in the life I had previously built for myself, I spent all of my time working to earn money to pay for my “things” – my apartment, my cable bill, PG&E, car insurance, gas – how the hell was I going to find a way to save up enough money to move to New York City? How can I show up in this city with a fistful of cash and NOT have to worry about finding a job immediately, so I could take the time to properly adjust to the new culture surrounding me? My prerogative moving across the country is to be an actor in a place where the possibility exists to support myself through my craft. The last thing I wanted to do was secure an apartment and then immediately start stressing over how I would pay the next month’s rent. I needed to figure out how I could sock away as much money as humanly possible to take the next step in my life.
So, I made the reluctant decision to give up my apartment. The tidy, stable life I had created for myself based on an old-fashioned model of the road to adulthood was anchoring me down in the Bay Area, trapping me in a cycle of dissatisfaction. All of the “things” I had accumulated – furniture, kitchen appliances, the apartment itself – were preventing me from truly chasing after my dreams. I mean, these were all things I had EARNED for myself, by myself…how could I even fathom giving them up? It wasn’t until a conversation with my good friend Leanne (who now is living and performing on the East Coast!) in between performances on a 2-show day, that my perspective really shifted. “Those are all ‘things,'” she said. “Couches, TVs, bikes…you can get rid of all of those, and you can always get them back. But what you can’t get back is time.”
That was the rightest thing she done said all day.
It was at that instant, quite literally, when my perspective shifted. Why was all of this material bullshit so important to me? Because I had earned it, paid for it with my own money, it somehow meant I should be bound to it forever, it should weigh me down and keep me from pursuing what the universe was clearly telling me I should be doing? Fuck that! As a person who has always considered themselves self-motivated, the overwhelming effect of a friend’s simple suggestion sent me into action. I had to slough off all of this excess – it wasn’t important, I didn’t need it, and it was draining my bank accounts and holding me back from my dreams.
So, at the beginning of this year, I gave away the majority of my belongings, packed up what I could fit into one room, and moved back in with my father. Twenty-seven years old, at the time, and moving back in with a parent. Normally, this would terrify and humiliate me. All of the work I had done to prove to myself that I could function as a responsible adult was quite literally being chucked into the dumpster. But, just as Leanne had said to me, I kept saying to myself, “You can get THINGS back, but you can’t get time back.” I could not…no, absolutely WOULD not…allow this arrangement to make me feel inadequate. I was doing this because, while life as I had established it for myself was fine, it wasn’t extraordinary. I needed to do whatever it took to make my life extraordinary. I never looked back.
Since moving back in with Dad, I was able to pay off my credit card debts and start saving my money. Relinquished from the chains of material possession and financial obligation, I was free to do more shows and concerts, still train my faithful clients at the gym part-time, and build my resume. I made my way to L.A. for a seemingly successful audition and callback Carnival Cruise Lines, where out of all the singers called back in L.A., I was the only male. I received notice shortly thereafter that I was in their “to hire” book, and they would keep me in the loop. Thrilled with the opportunity, I created a new plan to do a contract or two with the cruise line, and use the money from my work to fund my New York City transplant. Well, after six months of giving me the runaround, asking me to submit dance videos of myself (which I embarrassingly did in my gym’s group exercise room during operational hours), and endless emails, Carnival was STILL unable to find a position for me on any of their ships. Disappointed? Absolutely. Discouraged? Hell no.
So, I decided I would make this happen the same way I had created opportunity for myself before – by working my ass off. Sitting down with a pencil and paper, I crunched numbers and spanned out the nine months ahead of me. In turn, I have devised a realistic savings plan that would allow me to pay my bills, have a social life (albeit somewhat limited), and be well-prepared for the New York. It is imperative to me that I be able to make this move and feel secure. A decent percentage of my earnings from the gym would funnel into my plan. ALL money I earn from performing or singing goes straight into the bank – it only seems right that my relocation to NYC should be funded by the paychecks I earn as an actor. With the plan I’ve created, I should be able to move to NYC with $10,000 in my pocket – enough to get the apartment and pay a couple months’ rent up front. This will allow me time to explore the city, attend auditions, and start taking acting and dancing courses – hopefully attending the CAP21 Summer conservatory program starting in June.
Now, I’m not an idiot. I don’t plan on moving out there and not finding a job. In fact, I’ll probably go crazy if I don’t get a job sooner than later – I won’t feel productive enough. Fortunately, my extensive experience and skills as both a personal trainer AND a bartender, as well as my self-motivated attitude toward life, reassure me that work won’t escape me easily. Bills will need to get paid, and they will – but the first few months of this transition are the most important for me. I am so thankful to have such a great support system, and to have the privilege of moving home so I can take the steps necessary to fulfill my life’s purpose.
I’m not moving to New York to see what happens, I’m moving to New York to create what happens.
Twerking Actor 